I need a remedial class on how to be an adult. I am currently failing home ec.
Somehow I missed the lesson about how you're supposed to change your pillows regularly - at least every two years. One of the factoids I encountered today stated that 10% of the weight of a 2-year-old pillow is dust mites and their droppings. I am sincerely hoping that one is an urban legend. But even the staid Mayo Clinic has excessively gross things to say about dust mites: "The residue that dust mites leave behind in the form of their feces and decaying bodies mixes with dust and becomes airborne." Gag me with a vacuum hose. This came up when it was revealed to Elizabeth that I have had my pillow for a very, very long time. So long that I cannot even bear to post it publicly; let's just keep it at a very, very long time. Everyone was appalled, including me.
I have always been a sneezer. If you know me you know this is a fact-o-Katherine. I'm never sick, I just sneeze and sneeze and sneeze some more. Year round. I've always been dubious that I actually have specific allergies, but now I'm not so sure. I have been keeping company with hundreds of generations of dust mites.
So today, in addition to driving 350 miles and writing a sermon from start to finish, I stripped the bed, vacuumed every surface in the bedroom, sacked the pillows, and ran load after load of hot, multiple-rinse cycle laundry. I also made it to Target in time to buy two cheap hypoallergenic pillows. I think I'm going to talk Ben into replacing the top mattress, as it's more akin in cost and structure to a hefty mattress pad. My throat hurts. It is no fun to face one's dust, nor the fact that dust mitigation isn't about preventing the coffee table from becoming a Magnadoodle.
While at Target, I also purchased a broiling pan. Because apparently, you aren't supposed to broil meat on cookie sheets. Not only was I overheating ill-suited pans (thereby, as Matt pointed out, inviting unseemly chemicals to leech into the meat and air [perhaps gassing the dust mites in the process??]), I also was setting off the occasional smoke alarm and/or fire. I guess it helps a lot when the grease drips through the slats in the broiling pan.
As horrifying as these discoveries were, I'm more horrified by this question: what else don't I know?
sheesh. it's no fair picking on a preacher before sunday. i don't think any of these things are false, but i think they may be exaggerated.but what do i know? i have a favorite, long held pillow, too.
ReplyDeletethis is about the funniest and most horrifying thing i have ever read...
ReplyDeleteThis belongs on your "best posts" sidebar. :D
ReplyDeleteeew. eew. eew. I am going to wash my linen right. now. and buy pillows immediately. eew.
ReplyDeleteThank you for the PSA.
I heard this too, dumped my fair share of pillows this week!
ReplyDeleteI hear you sister! Reading up on dust mites and other groodies is what fueled my OCD.
ReplyDeletegoodness.
ReplyDeletemaybe when you complete the "how to be a grownup" course, you can fill me in how to balance the checkbook.
thanks.
This post cracked me up. And made me itch. I think I may be buying new pillows too. Ick!
ReplyDeleteOh goodness - are there dust mites in Bakers Square, too? "cuz you sneezed about a zillion times when we were there! :)
ReplyDelete(Don't mind me... going to wash my sheets now...)
I once watched an Oprah show about dust mites. Oprah revealed that she has her sheets changed every day.
ReplyDeleteMe? I get around to it when I get around to it.
And I think we have established that I'm WAY older than you, so don't sweat it.
Oh, I'm gagging. You don't want to know how old our pillows are. Oh, that's disgusting. I'm not putting off new pillows anymore...
ReplyDeletei usually have fairly new pillows, but not because i knew this fact. i just don't like flat pillows. but i also wash my pillows a lot. we have one of those energy efficient, tumbling washers and it cleans my pillows like no other. i hope that gets rid of dust mites.
ReplyDeleteOh dear. you need a new pillow!
ReplyDeleteI worry about what I don't know, too.
ReplyDeleteUgh! You know, I think if my Home Ec teacher shared these things, I might have actually paid attention.
ReplyDeleteOkay, I'm gonna get Monk a new pillow today, whether he wants it or not. Thing is, I gave him my old (very, very old) feather pillow as a gift. Or so I thought... I wonder if there are any feathers actually left in it. ...[sound of door closing...going to Target now.]
Katherine,
ReplyDeleteMy wife suffers from allergies too. I find using a vacuum cleaner with a high-efficiency particulate airfilter and changing the filter on the furnace/air-handler once a month (also with a HEPA) helps. Depending on how old your home is, it may be helpful to get the ducts cleaned.
I take my feather pillows to the drycleaners every so often (read 1.5-2 years), but looks like I need to do them more. Part of the deal w/ drycleaning pillows is they completely replace the ticking. Getting new feathers added costs more, but I do that sometimes too. I grew up with feather pillows and stories of "home stuffed" pillows from grandma's chickens. I can tolerate "fiberfill," but prefer BIG floofy feathers! And yeah, dust mites are my #1 allergy :(
ReplyDeleteAs far as not knowing it all...that's okay, I've learned a ton a "basics" since starting Pampered Chef...stuff I should've known but didn't! Hang in there and remember that the journey's important too! --Karla